Friday, January 20, 2012

The Moment Every Mother Dreads: Chocolate or Poop?

The Parsons' household is currently in the thick of potty training.

Day 1 went as well as can be expected and I could bore you with all the details but last night things really got interesting!

As we were putting Jackson in the tub, he started to go pee pee.  So, I picked him up and put him on the toilet and he finished going.  Of course, Bryan and I hooted and hollered and made ourselves look like fools as Jackson clapped and said "Yay!"  And since he went on the potty, he got a few M&Ms.  I let him eat them as he continued to sit on the potty and I rounded up a towel, pjs, etc and then Bryan put him in the tub.

This is what happened in the next 2-3 minutes:  

I look down at the water and notice little brown flakes. 

Me:  What are those brown flakes in the water?  Uh oh, I think he's pooping in the tub.

Bryan:  What?

I slosh the water around only to notice more and more brown flakes.

Me: Yeah...Oh yeah, he's pooping in the tub.  Quick we gotta get him out!

Bryan throws the potty seat on the toilet and I whisk Jackson out of the tub, his play razor still in hand and put him on the toilet.  

Me:  Jackson, you need to go poopie on the potty.  Can you be a big boy and...

I'm stopped mid-sentence as I look at Jackson's face only to see his play razor, hands, and mouth covered in brown stuff.

Me:  AHHHHH!...

Bryan:  What's wrong?

Me:  He's eating it!  HE'S EATING POOP!  It's all over this razor.  GROSS!  HELP ME GET IT OFF! GROSS!

Jackson's smile is from cheek to cheek and he's fully enjoying this Crazy Mom bit I'm giving him.

Bryan:  It's all over his legs too.

Me:  Just get it off!  AHHHHH!

Bryan, being the calm and logical one here, smells it.  

Bryan:  Wait, I think it's is just an M&M.

I smell my fingers and drop to my knees as the panic leaves my body.

Me:  Hallelujah Jesus, it's just chocolate!  

Bryan:  Looking at me like I'm a crazy woman.  Wooooooow!

Me:  Just put him back in the tub.

Needless to say we both had a good laugh.  

Nothing will make you feel disgust and panic like thinking your child is eating poop.  NOTHING.

Hope you enjoyed!



  1. THat was great!!! I laughed so hard when i read this bc i could imagine you 2 in that situation!! LOL And I definately remember those days!! HA!! Keep the updates coming!

  2. Congrats for braving potty training and having some success. Ben screams when we put him on the potty, the big one with the special seat or the little one his size. So we are holding off on potty training and pray he comes around soon. I'll remember this and not go with M&M's. Thanks for the laugh.